Match #1 - Boomerang vs Los Bombola
Boomerang walked down to the ring with his music and grabbed a microphone. The gist of his insulting diatribe was that Mr. D needed to come out and explain why he was fighting a lowlife at the beginning of the card. Mr D walked out and explained to Boomerang that his threats and behaviour would not be tolerated, so as long as he was making trouble, he'd be fighting in the opening match. Boomerang was heading up towards the entrance most likely to assault Mr. D when Los Bombola walked out, attacking Boomerang, throwing him into the ring and starting the match.
If Boomerang wanted to send a message to Mr. D however, this match certainly did the trick. Bombola got a couple of moves in, but basically it was nothing but domination from Boomerang. For most of the match, Boomerang tried to make Bombola sumbit with a sharpshooter, but finally after a lot of punishment and a Dingo Drop, the 3 count hit.
Winner: Boomerang via the Dingo Drop - 10 min, 35 sec
Match #2 - El Turnipo vs Subby Phillips
A valiant effort by El Turnipo but his inexperience in the ring was quite evident in this match. Subby spent most of the bout reversing Turnipo's moves, and showing off his great knowledge of submission holds. Finally it was too much for Turnipo to take and he tapped. I hope Subby is happy with himself.
Winner: Subby Phillips via Torture Cobra Twist - 15 min, 54 sec
Match #3 - The Serpent vs Mitchell
Mitchell came down to the ring first and entered. The Serpent walked down with Reginald Waters escorting him. The Serpent got in the ring and Reginald tried to follow. Mustafa prevented him from entering and locked the cage. Outraged, Reginald paced around the outside of the cage yelling at Mitchell.
The match was almost the exact opposite of Mitchell's fight with Bare Bear. Mitchell dominated The Serpent like we've never seen. His edge was most certainly given to him at the start of the match, when he revealed that he'd brought his own weapons. Using a sickle and a fork, Serpent was bleeding all over the ring in short time. From there Mitchell used a variety of hard strikes, submission moves, and attacks from the singapore cane already in the ring. After every blow, Mitchell would glare in Reginald's direction. Mitchell locked on the Fuyuki Special. After all this punishment, Serpent did not tap. In fact the move had rendered him unconscious. Mustafa lifted his arm to test, and on the 3rd drop, Mitchell was declared the winner. The cage was unlocked, and Reginald escaped into the crowd before Mitchell could get to him.
winner: Mitchel via Fuyuki Special - 16 min, 43 sec
Match #4 - Rick vs Parachute McGilacuddy
This is about as even a fight as you can get between a vain fatman and a sexual deviant. Blows, throws and strikes were traded back and forth for almost 20 minutes. Plenty of two counts and plenty of kick outs. Nothing could keep either competitor down. Finally Parachute reversed a strike into the Reverse Gory Special and picked up the win.
Winner: Parachute McGilacuddy via Reverse Gory Special Bomb - 17 min, 10 sec.
Match #5 - J.M. Stryker vs Booty Kall vs TNT vs Yob (Ultra Title #1 contender's match)
To quote the WWE's Good ole JR, this was one hell of a slobberknocker. For the first 5 minutes you couldn't tell what was happening, it was just a tangle and a mess of bodies wailing on each other. There were a few devastating double teams and lots of near falls, but Booty Kall was on fire. Around the 10 minute mark he eliminated both Yob and TNT with the BK Bomb, one shortly after the other. Stryker was no slouch though, and for the remainder of the match, Booty and Stryker tore up the ring in an amazing display of wrestling. The match ended when Booty whipped Stryker into the ropes. Stryker reversed the whip and when Booty came back, Stryker hit Booty in the face with a huge fireball. Booty writhing in agony on the mat, Stryker locked on the Kido clutch and Booty Kall tapped to it.
Winner: JM Stryker via Kido Clutch 15 min, 49 sec
Match #6 - The Condors vs Devastation (Tag Title Match)
These two teams have met many times in Ultra Wrestle and both have won the tag belts off the other before. It was speed vs strength as it seemed that Lion and Destructo were dominating Trebor and Amigo, but their speed and reversal ability would pay off, gaining reprive or breaking up the pin. We had a close call with a 2 count as Lion kicked out of the Tiny Drop at the last second. Also when the match spilled to the outside, Amigo hit Destructo with the Reverse Plantation (although both were not the legal men). It ended when Destructo was able to hit the You Are Out on Amigo in the center of the ring. Trebor ran in to break up the count but Lion rushed to the ring and knocked him down with a clothesline. 1,2,3, Devastation are your new tag champs!
Winner: Devastation via You Are Out - 21 min, 19 sec